Podcaster, former monk and CPO (Chief Purpose Officer) of the Calm app, Jay Shetty, aims to make wisdom go viral. He's on a mission to share the world's timeless wisdom in an accessible, relevant, and practical way, and he does so by raising important questions like the theme of his SXSW talk: “I Miss You When You're By My Side.”
With this, he invites us to think that, even when we are physically with people, distractions often hinder meaningful interactions, resulting in wasted time. Shetty explores the elusive nature of love, describing it as challenging to explain as its meaning has lost its meaning, to the point where we relate it to the fear of loneliness instilled by social norms.
Shetty brought data that we spend an average of 36 hours a week on social media or watching TV, while we spend 8 hours talking to our partner, which translates into couples spending four times as much time watching screens as interacting with each other. Other curious data are the topics of conversations: 23% of the time is talking about what the next meal will be or conversations involving temperature. In other words, nothing that truly connects us with each other.
Shetty emphasizes the importance of deepening connections for happiness, suggesting the “5 E's of connection”: entertainment, education, emotional exchange, engagement and celebration, defined as sharing what we love with the people we love. He proposes 3 relationship check-ins which are questions that will bring real connections because they make room for high vibrational feelings such as gratitude, sincerity, comfort, happiness, relaxation, trust and love.
Here are some examples:
- Weekly: What is something you are excited about this week? Is there something you are looking forward to that I can help with?
- Quarterly: Are we satisfied with the direction this relationship is going? What are we willing to do to improve it?
- Annually: What are your goals for this year and how can I support you?
In this way, Jay Shetty invites us not only to reflect on the importance of authentic connections, but also to incorporate regular checking practices into our relationships, promoting a journey of joint growth and personal fulfillment.
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